Why Do We Fall in Love?
I am assuming that our title of the blog hooked your attention & brought you here to know about all about to not fall in love before marriage. I think I don’t have to start it by telling you the definition of love. We all have more or less idea about that. Let’s just skip that part. To know about why we shouldn’t fall in love we need to know why do we fall in love at the first place? It’s a question that has fascinating poets, philosophers, scientist & every common people for thousands of years. It’s an interplay of biology, psychology & social aspect which captivates our heart.
If we start explaining it by biology, falling in love is driven by the rush of neurotransmitters & hormones flooding in our brain. The dopamine release creates euphoria & excitement when we are around the person we’re interested in. And oxytocin which is named as “Love Hormone” encourages bonding, trust & deepens our emotion.
And psychologically, love fulfils our emotional need for intimacy. We fall in love due to the desire for companionship, support, understanding & sense of own & emotional security.
And in talk about the social aspect, social pattern & personal experience shapes our perception & influences us to be interested in someone. From romantic films to story books, our elders, friends & everything around us plays a significant role to make us feel the desire to love someone.
Ultimately, the reason for falling in love varies from individual to individual. It can be the thrill of chemistry, the comfort of emotional need or the influence of social aspects the reason for falling in love always keeps its mystery.
Reasons We should not fall in love before marriage & it’s benefits:
Falling in love before marriage can be thrilling & an exciting experience. And in movies & fictions falling in love is portrayed in a very romanticised view. But mostly what they don’t show is the potential drawbacks of it. Choosing not to fall in love has its practical & personal benefits. Here are some reasons of it:
- Religious Belief: In some culture & religion having any sort of romantic connection is prohibited. The concept of arrange marriage without any romantic involvement before marriage is prioritized & practiced. This belief prioritizes compatibility, family harmony & social stability over romantic love. One thing to always keep in mind that, every religion is beautiful & they only call you to the path of happiness.
- Emotional Stability: By refraining from relationship before marriage one can prioritize emotional stability & self-discovery. And this allows an individual to focus on their personal growth and development without any distraction & the complication of the relationship. Emotional stability helps a person to maintain inner balance, clarity & self-assurance. It allows a person to explore & understand their own emotions, desires & needs.
- Clarity of Priorities: Without the effect & influence of any romantic engagement, one can better focus & prioritize their own goals of life, career aspirations & life values. And being able to focus on personal objectives & long-term plans without the distraction gives a real booster to a person’s improvement. Whether it’s advancing in career, education or achieving personal milestones, clarity allows a person to stay motivated & focused.
- Avoiding Heartbreak: Falling in love with an uncertain future mostly causes the heartbreak, disappointment, emotional trauma & sufferings. Choosing not to be invested in any emotional investment before marriage can save a person from this unwanted heartbreak & sufferings. This decision can safe gourd their heart & minimize risk of painful break ups.
- Preserving Independence: Maintaining independence is a crucial thing to do in life. Once a person confessed his/her feelings to anyone there arises a big question to their independence. By avoiding romantic entanglements before marriage one can preserve their independence & become more devoted to their personal life’s goals & interests. Remember, commitment isn’t an issue here. The issue is maintaining the healthy boundary.
- Family & Social Support: Most of the family is uncomfortable with their children being involved in any romantic relationship before marriage. And it’s also uncomfortable for the children to confess & talk about their relationship openly with their family. In most cases, the children are seemed to be hiding about their relationship from their family. To avoid this uncomfortable situation, it is better to not be entangled in any sort of relationship before marriage.
Things to Do to Overcome Loneliness.
Choosing to lead a single life before marriage is one of the best forms of self-awareness. And it is best because it gives you the opportunity to many directions of your life, saves your feelings & lets you enjoy the freedom which you need to fulfil your goals. Here are some tips to avoid falling in love before marriage:
- Focus on Personal Growth: Give importance to improve yourself. Invest your time & energy in self-discovery, setting goals, improving yourself & fulfilling them. Take time to explore & understand your needs. Engage in activities which you like & which allows you to learn & explore to newer things. Do things that you enjoy & what matters to your growth the most.
- Set Boundaries: It means to establish guidelines, limits, expectations for oneself & maintaining those factors in order to save their mental, physical & spiritual well-being. Individuals must set their boundary in mental, physical, communication & spiritual perspective. It involves identifying & honouring your own feelings, needs, desires & as well as respecting of others. Setting boundaries is a proactive & empowering practice that helps a person maintain freedom, self-respect & emotional well-being.
- Stay Grounded in Reality: Identify the difference between infatuation & genuine emotional connection. Always maintain the realistic perspective. Remember, love & relationship requires effort, communication & compromise. Instead of expecting fairy tale romance or expecting your partner to fulfil all your desires, stay grounded in reality. And lastly,
- Be Patient & Trust the Process: Recognize that avoiding falling in love before marriage requires patience, self-control, discipline & tolerance of loneliness. Prioritizing falling in love before marriage is completely a personal choice but understand that this journey may not be easy as it requires time, effort & self-reflection to stay true to your own judgement. By trusting & being patient you’ll allow yourself the freedom to grow, learn & evolve at your own pace.
Well at the end I must say, if you’re someone who is not ready for marriage right now you must refrain yourself from getting involved in any kind of romantic relationship. You must also maintain the friendzone very carefully. You must be very disciplined to yourself from not falling into any trap. It’s like being the only non-smoker friend in the circle, full of smokers. It’s even harder because in the case of smoking, you know it is bad for health & you possess a negative idea about it from many ago. But you really don’t have the real idea of the bad effects of getting into a relationship before marriage. So, keep yourself disciplined & maintain the boundary always.
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